An antidote to hardness of heart
Proper 22B (Trinity 18) (For an alternative script click here)
Mark 10.2-16
A certain bishop, who was a rather old and forgetful gentleman, went to hear the first sermon of a newly appointed vicar. The vicar told the congregation, ‘The happiest days of my life have been spent in the arms of another man's wife.’ There was an electric shock throughout the congregation, people only relaxed and smiled when the preacher added, after a suitable pause, ‘In the arms of my mother.’ The bishop was very impressed and decided to incorporate in his next sermon. In the cathedral he began his sermon, ‘The happiest days of my life have been spent in the arms of another man's wife.’ Again there was a reaction of shock from the congregation. The old Bishop paused, and then stuttered in confusion, ‘But I can't remember who she was ...’
Forgive the cliché of starting with an old joke! Notwithstanding that the bishop’s forgetfulness, the family in all its aspects is a topic made much of in church circles. It is constantly referred to in sermons, newsletters, and the media. It seems the church is always saying that it must stand as a bulwark against the erosion of family life. The family is seen as the very cement of society. Mum and dad secure and involved, nurturing and providing for two or three children, grandparents providing support and help; or if they are aged and infirm themselves being provided for in the bosom of the family. I don't need to elaborate the picture. They pull together, they played together, they prayed together.
But it's not true is it? It's an idealised picture and by constantly harping on it I'm sure we in the church reinforce the guilt people have about their families and about their failures in family life. The ideal of family exerts great influence and it's always been like that but what the family has actually been has varied enormously. For example, there is assumed in our
gospel passage the unquestioning subordination of women in marriage - a man can dismiss or divorce his wife, although the exact conditions varied from one rabbi's teachings to another. What the ramifications of family actually means has varied enormously. Yet the idealised picture exerts great pressure.
The message of Jesus is not about conforming to some pattern imposed from without – it’s about the quality of relationships from the inside.
It’s about a bond of giving. When the relationship of Christ and the Church is compared to the husband and wife giving
is made much of - Christ gave himself for the church. When you have a small baby you know that you're going to have to give a great deal, at the very least a full night's sleep! Giving comes before receiving and only slowly does the baby
develop and start to give you something back. It's all that we expect of a baby, but it's true of other relationships too.
The Jesus message is about a bond of commitment: to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health. A baby is a heavy commitment that doesn't end. Lack of commitment destroys people - elderly people can literally curl up and die when no one is committed to them. Many hell-raising kids are profoundly unsure of their parents’ commitment to them. Without commitment relationships die.
The Jesus message is about a bond of trust. The child with a bad nightmare wakes up screaming, mum takes her in her arms. ‘It's all right.’ The fear and panic subsides. I trust you mother. It’s not just a childish thing, we all need to trust and be trusted. When dad lets his son drive the family car by himself for the first time there is a lot more going on than the simple sharing of a family resource! Trust actually builds people. The individual who has never been trusted will himself find it impossible to trust.
Jesus is not ashamed to call us ‘brothers and sisters’ and that means giving as he gave, trusting as he trusted; and knowing the fruits of his commitment in the commitments we make.
Let your light so shine before others, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
Forgive the cliché of starting with an old joke! Notwithstanding that the bishop’s forgetfulness, the family in all its aspects is a topic made much of in church circles. It is constantly referred to in sermons, newsletters, and the media. It seems the church is always saying that it must stand as a bulwark against the erosion of family life. The family is seen as the very cement of society. Mum and dad secure and involved, nurturing and providing for two or three children, grandparents providing support and help; or if they are aged and infirm themselves being provided for in the bosom of the family. I don't need to elaborate the picture. They pull together, they played together, they prayed together.
But it's not true is it? It's an idealised picture and by constantly harping on it I'm sure we in the church reinforce the guilt people have about their families and about their failures in family life. The ideal of family exerts great influence and it's always been like that but what the family has actually been has varied enormously. For example, there is assumed in our
gospel passage the unquestioning subordination of women in marriage - a man can dismiss or divorce his wife, although the exact conditions varied from one rabbi's teachings to another. What the ramifications of family actually means has varied enormously. Yet the idealised picture exerts great pressure.
The message of Jesus is not about conforming to some pattern imposed from without – it’s about the quality of relationships from the inside.
It’s about a bond of giving. When the relationship of Christ and the Church is compared to the husband and wife giving
is made much of - Christ gave himself for the church. When you have a small baby you know that you're going to have to give a great deal, at the very least a full night's sleep! Giving comes before receiving and only slowly does the baby
develop and start to give you something back. It's all that we expect of a baby, but it's true of other relationships too.
The Jesus message is about a bond of commitment: to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health. A baby is a heavy commitment that doesn't end. Lack of commitment destroys people - elderly people can literally curl up and die when no one is committed to them. Many hell-raising kids are profoundly unsure of their parents’ commitment to them. Without commitment relationships die.
The Jesus message is about a bond of trust. The child with a bad nightmare wakes up screaming, mum takes her in her arms. ‘It's all right.’ The fear and panic subsides. I trust you mother. It’s not just a childish thing, we all need to trust and be trusted. When dad lets his son drive the family car by himself for the first time there is a lot more going on than the simple sharing of a family resource! Trust actually builds people. The individual who has never been trusted will himself find it impossible to trust.
Jesus is not ashamed to call us ‘brothers and sisters’ and that means giving as he gave, trusting as he trusted; and knowing the fruits of his commitment in the commitments we make.
Let your light so shine before others, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
